No, I didn't join the army. Tonight should be, however, the most embarrassing night of my life. I decided in all my wisdom to go to a party to celebrate the end of highschool for the last group of people I know that are still in highschool. I usually let it all hang loose with these kids cause they're so young and I'm not particularly afraid of their opinions of me, but tonight I literally, literally, let it all hang loose. Let's just say I decided to wrap myself in a blanket and take all my other clothing off. When the kids realized this they decided it was time to reclaim the blanket. And that is when Lt. Pereira (Lootenant in the U.S., Leftenant in Canada) made his (first) appearance of the night. I admittedly wasn't very drunk at the time so after a very short delay I grabbed some paper towels to cover myself, found my boxers and walked calmly to the corner to make myself decent.
A couple minutes later while I was standing around in my boxers I was pantsed and Lt. Pereira made a second appearance. What really surprises me is the fact that i don't really care about either event. I think I may have lost all shame. I should have hid in a corner, dressed, and gone home after the first incident but all I did was put my boxers on and continue drinking. I realize I'm typing quite well but it is taking quite the effort (and time) to do so.
Eventually the party died and I asked the last group to leave what was happening, when they said they were going to someone's house to swim I followed them regardless of the fact that I didn't really know any of them. Luckily the host from the first party showed up as people were entering the pool. Once in the pool I declared my interest in removing my underwear, and no one complained, so I did (eventually most of the people in the pool were thoroughly naked). There was a time (yesterday, and the rest of my life before then) when I would have shuddered at the thought of being naked infront of a group of people, but tonight I was more than willing to jump up and down in the shallow end.
I'd like to know where my shame went.
Missing:
One Catholic Boy's Shame
Goes by the name of Anthony the dirty sinner
Likes the dark and crushing spirits.
If you find my shame please let me know, I can't keep going around without any clothes on or I might get arrested.
Keep on trangling, clothed or not,
Anthony
19 comments:
My wonderful penis has no shame. The rest of me should perhaps remain clothed these days, though.
There are pictures of the event and I do infact look like a heroin addict as some of the comments to previous posts may suggest.
If you're looking for shame, perhaps you should try your parents' house. It pretty much lives there.
Though not addled by shame, I do have sensitivity, so I remain clothed at all times in the interests of others.
This is how the majority of the guys I went to high school with spent their time at parties - naked and jumping up and down. Many of them stood atop tables shouting for everyone to rest our eyes on the glory of their nudity.
I always thought of this as normal male behavior.
I completely sober now and I still don't care. I was pretty sure the next day I'd be making my noose.
we lived together for a year and i never got to see you naked, wtf?!
I was publically pantsed in the hallway the night of the Ontario Provincial elections. You must have missed it.
Move to Jersey. There is no shame there.
I, like Owl, remain clothed to ensure others that they will have future functionaltiy from their eyes. However, that has not always stopped me. One time at a party I was laying naked in the lawn, still drinking. Actually now that I think of it, it was my party. Alas, I have put my naked days behind me.
Shame is for the weak. Do what you like, when you like!
Nick, passers-by probably just thought you were one of those cherub lawn ornaments.
ubermilf:
that is officially the funniest comment you've ever written.
Hey I think I found it! Is that it over there? Oh wait no, that’s just a bottle cap.
Cap'n Stabben always gets drafted when there is alcohol around but at least it’s been awhile cause these days he might get all Vietnam on some poor civilian. Your night reminds me of when I was three clicks south of the HoChi Minh Trail, knee deep in a rice patty wearing nothing but one sock and it wasn’t even on my foot.
Well, I am a fat little baby with a tiny thingy. So yeah, I could see it.
wait, you mean I missed you naked? more then twice? I knew I shouldn't have gone home with Tania!!
And don't worry, I've done the same, nothing like a naked party every now and then to get the fun going!
Brooke- Good to know
Nick- You must mean the philosohpy of DWYLWYL. Not easy to say, but don't if you don't want to.
Ubie- My passers by thought I was really drunk. They were wrong.
Dia- EVER? Really? Here come the hyperbole police to take you away to exaggerationtraz. Thnak you to American Dad for the joke
Cheyenne- I've tried, but the sock never wants to stay on. Maybe I need to switch to smaller socks...
Nick- You type well for a baby.
Dianna- You did indeed miss my naked escapades. That's why only losers and monks leave parties before midnight.
Yeah, baby me has mad skillz. With a "z" and everything.
i too was naked in the shallow end. Lest we forget.
I assume that was Joe...
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