New Pet Peave

I've been noticing lately that there seems to be a certain attraction by everyone to my head. Uncounted masses (probably around 10) just can't seem to stop themselves from rubbing and or scratching my scalp. I have no clue why. I certainly didn't ask any of them to do it, and they certainly didn't ask permission. It's gotten so bad that after repeated assaults tuesday I had to forcefully ask for a ceasefire because my scalp actually hurt. I don't mind my hair being played with, I actually rather enjoy that, but who on earth would want someone to smoosh their hair into their scalp palm down or worse yet scratch it directly with the fingernails? Maybe it's because of some jealousy over my non-going-bald-ness; some of the worst culprits are male. Even if that isn't the reason, that is likely to be the result if people don't lay off. What do they expect from repeated scratching and friction?

This is a warning- if you wanna play with my hair, ask, and if I give you permission, take it easy. Any transgressions will result in a swift punch to either the a) Ovary or b) Testes.

Keep on Tranglin,
Anthony

17 comments:

Fucking Bingo said...

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be rough with your hair. I'll be good. I promise.

Ubermilf said...

Are you all fuzzy and loveable?

Fella said...

What if the person administering the unrequested head scratching has neither overies nor testes?

Fucking Bingo said...

then he'll just punch me in the jaw. i mean them... not me... them.

Spirit Of Owl said...

The forces at work here are beyond mere Canadians.

Fella said...

I lost my cglsadddsssses once. It was the most horrifying expereince of my life.

Scarlet Hip said...

I look forward to meeting you so I can mess up your hair. I won't scratch you though, not unless you ask me to.

Fella said...

I think you left them on the asfioubasf.

Fucking Bingo said...

Nick is always so helpful like that. (I think it makes Anthony a little jealous.)

Fella said...

I am nothing if not a gentleman.

Ubermilf said...

Nick has ovaries.

And he smells.

Fella said...

Your music thingy works better than any of the other ones I've seen.

Anonymous said...

I've already tried to answer some of these comments, but blogger was a bitch and I fear may still be, but I'm going to try again, but not from the beginning because I'm lazy.

Brooke- I grant you permission in advance to do what you will with my head.

Melissa- Was Nick right? Were they on the asfioubasf?

Nads- No I think Nick must be jealous of me, otherwise why would he be stealing all my friends?

Nick- Then you must be nothing.

Becca- All is forgiven. I was in a pissy mood that has since passed.

Ubie- I new Nick smells, but I didn't know he had ovaries. Are they like, his or did he buy them at some sort of ovary store?

Nick- I found it last night and thought it was worth a try, glad you like it, unless you're being sarcastic, in which case your face works better than any of the other ones I've seen. It doesn't seem to even appear with IE here on campus, I didn't bother trying it at home with IE.

Melissa- Music thingees hate you.

Anonymous said...

There should be a k in that new.

Anonymous said...

Strike that, it does appear in IE, it's just way, way down at the bottom of the page. Meh. If people want my blog to display properly they can stop using IE.

Fucking Bingo said...

nick only seems to be stealing some of your friends. becca specifically.

Fella said...

It's true. We plotted a bank robbery today. Also there was talk of body swapping her with a spaniard.

I wasn't being sarcastic. Like, Melissa, I typically hate music thingys. But this one actually works right and lets me skip the crappy songs and play the good ones. and it's not crazy loud either.